You’re not broken and do not need fixing. What you need is self explanatory and self-acceptance to cure your fractured components, so they are made whole again. What you are experiencing is an chance to grow that may appear as being busted. In actuality, you are losing your old self to make room for the real you to emerge.
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You do not need more posts like this to convince one of your own worth. Whilst they provide reassurance, they are just a guide because your true character will emerge when you drop your former self. The heartache, disappointment and pain you experienced served a purpose; to wake you to your best self. Regrettably, a lot of men and women perceive this as being broken, as it’s life leaving the door ajar in order to light the way for your own transformation.
Mary O’Malley in: What’s in the Way Is the Way: A Practical Guide for Waking Up to Life. You may think: why do I want to be transformed if I’m not broken? This is so you can have the completeness of your being, which comprises: awakening to your higher potential, giving and receiving love and finding the essence of your true self. You’re never broken to start with, but getting a process of renewal.
Sometimes, it might look as if the bits have fallen apart because you’re yet to see the whole picture. It’s comparable to looking at the bits of a jigsaw puzzle, oblivious to how it will come together. You’ve got unrealised potential waiting to emerge. You need only take the next step and trust you’re being guided to merge with your self. Don’t be discouraged if life seems chaotic occasionally. This occurs when you shift your focus to the fragmented parts rather than seeing how they are going to come together to form the whole.
You’re comprised of dark and light, for each compliments the other in a sea of duality. If you concentrate on the unintegrated parts, you will probably perceive yourself as broken. Yet, when dark and light unite, they become one like the Yin Yang symbol, representing contrary forces which are interrelated and complementary. You’re most likely to make errors, some of which you may repent. However, I encourage you to not live upon your regrets but to be compassionate with yourself, so you continue to grow and evolve.
The human soul attempts to evolve, otherwise you stay stuck and stagnant. This is exactly what many experience around midlife when they lose their individuality. Some folks spend a lifetime trying to fix themselves to become ideal to appeal to others. Yet, if they aren’t received in the way they expect, they think there is something wrong with them. I liken it to scrubbing rust off metal expecting it is going to reveal the gorgeous chrome finish beneath.
However, in scrubbing you realise that the rust is a natural part of the metal. By adopting it, you come to love it as a special feature rather than something to be polished off. Buddhist nun Pema Chodron in: When Things Fall Apart: Heart Advice for Difficult Times. You’re not broken but breaking through your shell to show your very best self. By accepting yourself as you are, you forego the self-hatred and disempowering ideas that obscure your true character.
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As a speaker and writer, I’ve noted the very same topics come up in my writing and talking over the last ten years. That is: enduring results when you resist what is. This concept is nothing new but something that the Buddha touched centuries past. When we let go of resistance and accept the terms of our life, what remains is peace and stability. Allow me to highlight this notion of releasing immunity through an example that happened recently. We experienced a terrible flu season in Australia this season, with lots of people falling sick, some requiring hospitalisation and regrettably many people passed away.
My family and I listened to the flu, yet they took longer to recover because they resisted their symptoms. I, on the other hand surrendered completely and stayed in bed for three days without medication. I slept through the whole ordeal and allowed my body to sweat the fever. Within three days, I had recovered my strength and was feeling much better. I remember my naturopath saying in the time that illness assists the immune system practice its resistance to bacteria and virus. In doing this, it kills off poorer cells which atrophy and are purged from the body. What does not kill you, makes you stronger. The lesson here is: immunity results in struggle.
Struggle always precedes pain and discomfort. To permit the power of life to flow through you, let go of your resistance and accept the conditions of life. You’re not broken, so love yourself precisely as you are, allowing another chapter of your life to unfold. Every new experience is a catalyst for growth. The past is there for a reason and shouldn’t be carried in the present moment, since it discolours your present moment experience. Surrender and trust that life has a plan for you, akin to the natural stream of water that finds its own level. Eventually, your personal growth will steer you to a terrific place if you comply with the present upstream rather than resisting it. The secret is to have faith in the process because the world won’t desert you. Sometimes it might look that way when you are consumed in suffering and pain. However, this is temporary and will gradually recede.